Wednesday, February 18, 2009

A Month in the Life . . . Collideoscope Style

I've been pretty much MIA from Collideoscope for months and months now. As many of you know, I was finishing my Masters degree and I'm happy to report that as of December I now posses a M.S. in Global Affairs!

That's the bright side.

The down side is that I've spent the last two months looking for a job, and probably to no one's surprise, have had zero luck so far. It's not all bleak, I'm working part-time for a wonderful organization and getting some paid experience in the field (which is much needed and appreciated). Anyway, the bottom line is that I've spent way too much time sitting in Borders, drinking coffee and trying to find ways to fill my days.

After talking to Kent, I've decided to start blogging about this experience. Personally, I'm hoping that it helps me process my feelings, thoughts and faith as I try to figure out what the next phase of my life has in store. I warn you in advance, I have every intention of being brutally honest and open. I welcome your feedback and input.

So let me bring everyone up to date on exactly where things stand.

I'm 31, living in New York City, just completed a Masters degree and am semi-employed. I have exactly one week to find a job or I have to tell my landlord that I'm moving out at the end of March. If that happens I will be moving in with a friend for the month of April while continuing to look for a job. Long-term - no job - scenario . . . if May rolls around without employment I am packing up my life and moving back in with my parents in Los Angeles.

I have no idea where God wants me to go or what he wants me to do with the next phase of my life. See, unlike with some people, the Lord has never written anything on my living room wall (lucky Belshazzar), he's never had a visiting evangelist (or my pastor for that matter) prophecy over me and I've never received a letter in the mail which directed me where I should go. Consequently, it's just me, a lot of prayer and moving toward an open door until the Lord either closes it or takes me through it.

I'm just beginning to wonder what you do when you've run out of options and there isn't an open door?


aahrens said...

Denelle - first let me say Congrats! on your masters - that's a great feeling and a wonderful accomplishment. Sounds like your chosen field is very applicable for today - just finding the right opening - that's the hard part.

You know, although we sometimes use this as an excuse for not having something ELSE to say, let me tell you what Dr. Gerald Jeffers told our church just about a month ago. He said that some people had lost their job as a part of God's design - that God was calling them into relationship with Him - that they had been praying to know God more, but hadn't really acted on it. Well, you haven't lost a job, but I think I would take this time to draw near to Him, to spend time listening to Him and maybe, just maybe, you'll learn to recognize his voice even more than you do now, so that when He DOES speak to you about employment, you'll know for sure it's Him.

I know what you mean about the "writing on the wall" bit. I wish so many times that God had email so I could just know. But I try to remind myself that if answers came so instantly, maybe I'd never spend time with Him - which, I remind myself over and over, is the reason for every life situation. I think I need a refrigerator magnet that says that - I forget so easily!

You'll be in my prayers....


Denelle said...

Thank you for such wonderful and encouraging words Ann!